Information for people who are abusive

If you are reading these pages because you are concerned about your behaviour towards your partner, well done for taking steps to consider what you need to do to change.

Change is possible.  It can take time, how much time depends on how embedded your behaviour patterns are and how motivated you are to change.

Domestic violence involves a person hurting another physically, psychological or emotionally, sexually, or financially. Over time, a climate of fear and intimidation can be created. It can be viewed as one person using their power and control over another.

If you think you may be behaving abusively, you may feel caught up in the pattern of behaviours.  We hope this website can help you understand a little about yourself, what you are thinking and feeling and how this impacts on your behaviour.

Most domestic violence is exerted by men over women though women can also be abusive and abuse can take place in same sex relationships.

We encourage you to continue your efforts to change, read through the sections that you think apply to you and follow up on the contacts available so that you can talk about your concerns.

Continue to seek help and you will begin to feel better about yourself.

Respect Phoneline 

Respect Phoneline is a confidential and anonymous helpline for anyone concerned about their violence and abuse towards a partner or ex-partner. A team of skilled professionals can offer advice, information and support to help you stop being violent and abusive to your partner. They will listen to you and help you.

Call Respect Phoneline on 0800 802 4040 (Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm). It is free from landlines and most mobile phones.

For more information visit or email (they aim to reply within two working days).

The MAZE Project

The Maze Project supports people to make positive change. It works with women who are affected by Domestic Violence, their partners and their children, who are not accessing services that could make a difference to their lives. The Maze Project identifies specific services, agencies and local resources and matches them to individual needs. Any agency wishing to make a referral can do by contacting the Maze Team.

If you are abusive and want to make a positive change you can also get in touch yourself on 01422 386 544.